I happen to think this was the best Sternal Journal of 2022
haha suckers, you thought you had a week off
Est. Read Time: 3 minutes. Read Time brought to you once again by the Ashburton Energy + Hair Logistics Group, in association with the Bradley Hills Bureau of Corrections + Housing.
Hello, Sternal Journalists!
I did indeed take an uncharacteristic pressure off of myself to get this in on time, partially because that is the type of thing people do in this week between Christmas and New Years Eve (that phenomenon seems to be a whole new meme this year, and because that “no-pressure-no-worries” thing is a thing I’m trying to bring into the new year for at least a week or so.1
BUT if you thought I was going to break my nearly three-year streak of sending you a weekly email, you got another thing coming.
Still, this one will be relatively phoned in. Next week (this Sunday or Monday), I will share with you some of the work I was proudest of over the year in case you missed it, but this week, I wanted to highlight the Sternal Journal I am proudest of.
It was of course, “I’m a Sagittarius who’s done DMT and I can’t hide it anymore,” my profile of a relatively anonymous friend who went into the wilderness literally and figuratively during the pandemic and, as is the case with every great story whether we like it or not, returned to her zone of comfort, having changed.
It is about a 50 minute read, but I’ve split it into 3 manageable 15-minute chunks. It is about empathy, conspirituality, light wackiness, dark wackiness, and doing one’s best.
The film rights are available and this is some Oscar-bait diamond-in-the-rough shit, I am telling you. All you Hollywood insiders who read this (there’s at least 15 of you) and don’t click through are leaving money on the table.
(very proud to end the 2022 season of Sternal Journal on a self-promotional challenge to Hollywood)
Wednesday. Television Show. I finally watched it. Thoroughly enjoyed, though I’m pretty convinced Jenna Ortega carried the whole thing on her stiff, clenched shoulders. Made me think there should be a word for reboots that have names slightly off of the original (Wolverine → Logan, The Addams Family → Wednesday, Archie → Riverdale). A divertonym? That is my best attempt.
The Washington Post Magazine. Magazine. Boo, I have just learned they’re ending one of my favorite things about Sundays in my mid-teens. (embarrassing to admit)
The Gene Pool. Substack. Regarding the above, I learned that Gene Weingarten, regular columnist for the Washington Post Magazine, was let go and is taking his talents to Substack. This is cool but also woozy because my desire when starting the Sternal Journal was to have something of a weekly column fully inspired by the Dave Barry-Gene Weingarten era of WaPo Magazine. So it’s sort of cool that we are, in a very very tenuous way colleagues, but also a bummer that the thing I was chasing is no longer there. But who knows what 2023 will bring!
Hope it’s a lotta fun!
Sending love and good tidings!
P.S. if you can find the cat in this picture, you win
P.P.S. I spend anywhere between two and twelve hours a week on the Sternal Journal. If you enjoy receiving it (and are RICH) consider becoming a paying subscriber. For just a few bucks a month, you can provide me with a bit more time to come up with fun topics, poems, and interviews; and you with probably fewer typos.
By the way, five days late and none of you say anything???? I thought you were my dearest Sternal Journalists!