Julian-based anagrams!
Which I have ruthlessly repurposed from a greater wordsmith than myself!
Est. Read and Puzzle Time Time: 4 minutes. Read Time brought to you once again by the Ashburton Energy + Hair Logistics Group, in association with the Bradley Hills Bureau of Corrections + Housing.
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SHOWS:
***SPECIAL REC*** If you’re in New York this Sunday 4/28, my friend Ben Kassoy is running his solo poetry show A Funny Thing About A Panic Attack***. I’m running the Brooklyn half-marathon that morning, so as long as things go according to plan, I’ll be there. Come watch with me. Twill be fun!
Comedians from the Future. May 2nd, Near Me Comedy! (I got comps galore!)
Comedy Loft (DC). May 28th. featuring for the great Sam Salem.
Pizza Party @ The Crow. June 24th. Tickets t come! Westside, free parking!
Hello Sternal Journalists!
This week: some puzzles!
My friend Zach Sherwin, creator of The Crossword Show (which you can and should see in a couple weeks at the Netflix is a Joke fest if you’re in LA!) and dabbler in various other extremely impressive things, requested my guinea pig services this week to test a new idea he’s working on. I will say no more than that other than (a) it is fun, and (b) if you like the Sternal Journal or former Julian Stern project, Word With Friend, it will be right up your alley.
Because it was a Zach Sherwin project, it heavily involved witty and enjoyable word-based puzzles (anagrams, to be specific). And because it was just a test, these puzzles will never be used anywhere else… unless I repurpose them for the Sternal Journal!
So here we go!
5 ANAGRAMS OF JULIAN STERN!
The way it works is I’ll provide the clues to a series of words, all of which (each series of words, that is) anagram to my name. I will give you one example so you get how it works:
EXAMPLE CLUE: Convent resident romantically rejects organ of hearing (3 words)
(Even though it’s an example, I will leave this sentence as buffer if you want to think about it for a second)
EXAMPLE ANSWER: NUN JILTS EAR
As you can see (if you feel like it), “Nun jilts ear” uses all of the letters from “Julian Stern” exactly once. That’s an anagram!
Now, it’s your turn. I’ll put the clues below (easiest to hardest in my opinion), and the answers below the recs. Happy wordplaying, and check out Zach whenever Crossword Show comes to your city!
Permit ‘60s-rock icon Joplin to sprint (3 words)
Queues for containers that are made by Mason or Ball and are filled with pecans (3 words)
A commemorative vase of sorts that contains the ashes of denim pants and is fire, poppin’, turnt, etc. (3 words)
A soft, muffled sound made by a Japanese martial-arts assassin (2 words)
A moral misdeed on a plane flight to the moon (3 words)
How many did you get? Were the hard ones hard? Am I just dumb! I’ll tell you what’s not dumb. These…
Recommendations!
The Lonely Island and Seth Meyers Podcast. Podcast. H/t to Sam Salem (come to his show at the Comedy Loft. I’m opening!) for letting me know about this. This charming podcast features fairly meandery and unproduced conversations from the members of Lonely Island and their friend Seth Meyers, as they chat about each digital short and also loosely how digital shorts changed SNL. They have not yet mentioned Stork Patrol, which is my favorite video of all time but I hope they do. They have mentioned how “lonely island” was what they called their apartment at Fairfax and Olympic, which I live a couple miles from. I can see how at 22 in the pre-Uber days of LA, this would have been a pretty lonely place to live.
sorry for everything. Album. Aldag is a way-too-young-to-be-this talented Liverpudlian who reminds of Carly Rae Jepsen, Bastille, and little dashes of Bo Burnham. I blasted it with the windows down while driving to Malibu yesterday, and you should too.
Get Down with Sam and Marley: Beer Chicken ft. Theo Von. Video. A very charming way to spend 12 minutes.
Conan O’Brien on Hot Ones. Video. Conan is so, so funny and it was very cool to see him interviewed so seriously about the art and business of talkshow hosting. It also led me to rewatch the opening sketch of Conan’s first episode of Late Night, which is simple and amazing.
Alrighty, that’s all and here are those answers!
LET JANIS RUN
NUT JAR LINES
LIT JEANS URN
NINJA RUSTLE
LUNAR JET SIN (I don’t know why this one was so damn hard for me!)
Have a wonderful week! I hope it’s full of enjoyable puzzles!
Love!
Julian!
P.S. I’m not sure if I’m pleased or saddened to share, but this is not A.I. Lit Jeans urns actually exist:
Thanks so much for the shout, Jules!
Crush. That. RACE.
(Also I find EVERY anagram impossible...no matter what!!)