The Sternal Journal: Show tonight in Los Feliz! 32 NEW Inspirational Quotes! Happy birthday to my mom!
The Julian Sternal Journal:
An Attempt at Tasteful Self-Promotion
An epic picture of birthday queen Alexis Stern to draw you in.
Greetings once again, Sternal Journalists!
Yes, that is my mom. Yes, she is and has always been way cooler than I am or ever will be. Yes, it is her birthday. So wish her a happy one!
Now back to me (only because she doesn't like attention and I do). Come on out to Los Feliz tonight! And then scroll down for a Sternal Journal EXCLUSIVE
Now, for that exclusive content. I recently decided that I wanted to find a way to give back to the Sternal Journal community, so lovingly built and forced into your inbox by me and me alone.
And what do people need more than anything? What keeps us going when everyone else turns their backs on us?
I N S P I R A T I O N A L Q U O T E S
That's right. We've been living for too long with the same 100,000 or so inspirational quotes interchangeably festooned upon our mugs and framed on the walls of our high school guidance counselors.
That's why I, Julian Stern, Editor-in-Chief and Publisher of the Sternal Journal, have created these brand new 32 inspirational quotes.
These are free for you to enjoy. Do what you will with them. Draw them. Put them to music. Get them tattooed (preferably in a visible place) on your body. It's up to you. But whatever you do, I only beg that you live by them.
32 New Inspirational Quotes for Mugs and Instagram
~Success is choosing the difference of next.~
~Failure is the never you need tomorrow.~
~Never ever, ever, ever, ever have what you want.~
~Don’t stop. The sun will come for you.~
~You are not human-sized.~
~Stare at your favorite people and no one else.~
~The juice rewards are always wine.~
~The dream of the goal needs to pop you. Nothing else.~
~Beyoncé never did it.~
~You’re the only person you ever need to meet.~
~The stopping is the starting without the good parts.~
~Some movies were made in the past. Some haven’t been made.~
~Never be a piece of work if you can’t be the whole work.~
~Be scared all the time.~
~Caffeine is a stimulant for the brain.~
~There are 500 dreams every day. You only need about 30.~
~Never describe your looks to someone who hasn’t seen them.~
~You are completely out of control.~
~Don’t let “Can’t” be a contraction.~
~If you’re having a hard day, you must be sad.~
~Lin-Manuel Miranda has the same eyes.~
~Never apologize for being rude.~
~Chaos is just Chardonnay without the r, the d, n, the other n, the second a, and the y, plus then there’s an s at the back.~
~When anxiety comes knocking, do a funny (non-racist) accent so they think you moved.~
~Other people’s opinions are like junk mail. Sometimes, there’s a good coupon.~
~Tell every stranger you meet they better listen to you.~
~Friends are humans you get to take apart.~
~Swallow your pride. It will pass through you naturally.~
~The greatest gifts are all bunched up.~
~You are not allowed to be up there.~
~Waste is the most important thing a body can make.~
~Ask yourself: would I ever be comfortable?~
Now that you've been thoroughly inspired, which one will YOU get tattooed (preferably in a visible place) on YOUR body?
(If these quotes made you think to yourself, "I like Julian's list-based humor, but I'd also like to read something of his that wasn't rejected by McSweeney's," you should check out The About Us Page of Every Digital Media Agency here!)
And finally, for making it this far, here's a gorgeous picture of me with today's birthday queen once (as well as a cameo from last week's birthday queen, Mollie Stern). Have a wonderful night, day, or whenever you read this!
Your friend,
Julian